I just been on the go nonstop beginning mid November, doc appts, vet appts, dental appts, other interruptions(weather), volunteer work, etc, that it’s gotten a bit out of control it seems. Just when it seems like when I going to have a moment to catch my breath and organize, another thing pops up like a couple of appts that didn’t make it into my planner. Thank god for the reminder calls the day before the appts. So it was like Tuesday evening while I was rehearsing the songs for this Christmas program with Sunny D, I started thinking about the upcoming race and the Christmas program. It dawned on me that the race is Sunday morning and so was the play! And it’s my daughter’s first time participating! Not only that, but she has a major role! No way was I going to miss her performance, but still I took in a breath of prayer as I got up from my seat to double check race date in hopes that I misread it and it’s actually on Saturday the 15th. I race into my office and quickly pulled up the race website, nope, no luck, it even state “Sunday, December 16, 2007”! Like a desperate fool, next I went on to compare the start time for the race and Christmas play time. The race start is half an hour earlier than the play, wouldn’t work. After all of this, looking back I still can’t believe I still held out for the possibility that I was still going to enter and run in this event. I mentioned the schedule conflict to my husband as soon as he walked in the door after returning from an aid call with the fire dept. I was delighted to hear him say that I should go ahead with my half marathon plans because I’ve looking forward to that for awhile and he was going to take lots of pictures & record our daughter’s Christmas play. And of course like a spoil selfish person, I was relieved to have my running event restored that night before going to bed.
It was during Wednesday’s noon run, that I finally came to my senses…probably when I was really started to hurt everywhere. I couldn’t believe myself. When did I become so self absorbed that I had actually made a choice to skip my child’s first major event!? What kind of a mother does that? I mean there’s always another race around the corner, but my daughter’s first play! Once you miss out, that’s it, no do-overs. Pathetic and unbelievable!
It’s almost like an addiction, where I had this compulsive desire to run in this race even with the lack of training. I had blocked out everything else and I was going to do whatever it took and cost to get myself there to take part. Mostly, I think because how busy my home and work life has been lately, I’ve been looking forward to this event to briefly take me away from the “real world”. A time not to be on the go with a ‘to-do’ list, a ‘get list’, a ‘to do’ list, and never feeling like you’re catching up. Half of it, I bring it upon myself, stuff I volunteer for, projects I dream up for myself, etc...some of you might have an idea of what I’m talking about. Something about racing, poor or strong performance, it always revitalized me.
As my daughter entered a packed sanctuary on her way to the stage with the rest of the kids, I knew I was where I should be no question about it. And she did one of those:
“Hi mom! I’m up here on stage mom!” as she’s waving her arms and hands with excitement. And the whole congregation laughed. I was one proud momma!